We’ve retired our Halloween costumes and started setting out the Thanksgiving decor, so you might be wondering: What is cobwebbing and why didn’t we leave it in October?
This term, coined by Bumble, refers to getting rid of anything in your life connected to an old relationship that is weighing you down — we’re talking everything from tees to pictures to text messages. While the term started out in a romantic context, clearing out the metaphysical cobwebs from your relationship patterns is a trend that can give you a fresh start in every area of your life.
What Is Cobwebbing?
Cobwebbing is the act of removing anything that reminds you of an old relationship, similar to the way you would clear out cobwebs in your home. Getting rid of items that remind you of the past relationship will help you be more present and move towards your future with a clean slate.
Cobwebbing Your Dating Life
This original context for cobwebbing revolves around clearing out old clutter, physically and emotionally, that a previous partner left behind. Whether you’re beginning a new relationship or you just need clarity to get back in the dating game, this will help you declutter your mental and emotional space, and also physically clear out your home at the same time.
You can start by collecting anything that belongs to your ex and boxing it up. You might want to keep some items if you use them often use and they don’t affect you emotionally, but you can also totally clear everything out. Whether you want to donate the items or give the box back your ex depends on how you’re feeling and how long you’ve been apart.
Start Your Cobwebbing Journey Here:
- Tee shirts
Another thing you can do after you’ve physically cleared out their items is delete their texts. We know how easy it is to just open your phone at any time and pour over something they said, but it’s not good for your mental health *and* it’s just wasting your time. Feel free to also unfollow them on Insta if you need to.
Cobwebbing Your Platonic Relationships
Cobwebbing isn’t just for your romantic relationships — it can be applied to your platonic ones as well. There are two types of cobwebbing you can do in this area of your life. The first is acknowledging that there might be some old friendships or other relationships that no longer serve you, and that’s okay. Check out our tips for how to know when to end a friendship if you need a place to start.
The second way you can do this is giving the close relationships you have some TLC. Whether you need to offer forgiveness (or ask for it), or you need to let go of a grudge, clearing the air with a good friend will only make your relationship stronger and your communication skills better.
Cobwebbing Your Personal Life
You might think cobwebbing is something for your external relationships, but it’s just as important to get a fresh start in your own mind and with your own personal self-reflection. Are there situations or choices you haven’t forgiven yourself for? Are you holding onto old habits that you’ve grown out of?
Figuring out how to show yourself love will allow you to grow in both your emotional and mental health.
A version of this article originally appeared here on brit.co